Swine Flu knows where you live

That's right fellow warrior watchers, swine flu is now on campus, and is spreading pretty fast. According to the university there is only one confirmed case, a female living in Schroeder, although MU won't disclose that last part. In addition, there are several suspected cases living in Straz, although again the university is not commenting on this. One of these cases reportedly ate in the cafeteria potentially infected everyone who was eating there. In addition according to several anonymous sources, a Straz cafeteria employee was sent home today with flu like symptoms, although again this information is not being discussed, and these sources were told only to say that the individual was not feeling well and were informed that the phrase "swine flu" was not to be said in the cafeteria.

It appears that in light of these recent cases the university is attempting, poorly, to cover up the actual extent of swine flu on campus and in doing so is merely increasing the likelihood that it will spread quite rapidly. Rather than being proactive and public about every case, MU is relying on students to determine whether or not they feel healthy enough to go to class, and if they don't they are to call Student Health Services (SHS) in order to find out if they have symptoms which may be swine flu, or H1N1/novel H1N1 as the university prefers, and then quarantine themselves. It would be much more helpful if the university released a daily chart of where the outbreak is occurring. For example if it were the case that the flu was most prominent at Schroeder, it would make sense for students to avoid that cafeteria, yet without any information students are effectively gambling and hoping that they can avoid contracting a deadly virus, which many epidemiologists fear will be as bad as the Spanish flu of 1918 which killed millions. If the outbreaks continue to worsen and people get sicker and sicker, it will be interesting to see if the university continues to try to keep everything under wraps, or if it owns up to the numbers of ill on campus and tries to intervene before something tragic happens. Let us all hope that MU is smart enough to get proactive, by passing out masks and hand sanitizers and isolating sick students.

I would also like to thank all of my anonymous informants without whom posts like this would not be possible. I owe many thanks to these individuals for their inside information into the workings of the university.